Double Sunrise Young Women's Health: early teen to college years

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High School Relationships

During high school years, as a young women you value close friendships and maintaining relationships with your family. Part of this is your ability to think of what's important on the inside (what you value, feel and want) as well as the outside (how you look).

As you develop close friendships, you may find the journey rewarding some times, and disappointing at other times. Friendship that you hoped would be good may turn in a way that makes you uncomfortable, and classmates that for a time you did not notice, may turn out to be the kind of friend that you've wanted.

You may ask yourself, "What is a healthy relationship?" If you're not sure, perhaps you could discuss this with a friend. Keeping connected with others, and listening to various points of views, will help you make choices that are best for you.

When high school girls need someone to talk to, most tell me that they go to their friends first. Talking to friends can be helpful, but sometimes you need more than that. At times you need to talk to an adult. An important question to ask yourself is, "Who are the adults in my life that I feel that I could talk to?"

Why is it important to think ahead of an adult to talk to?
Research shows that when a young woman has one adult to talk to, that it enhances her health. Even if you don't have an immediate reason, it's good to think ahead, and besides, perhaps a friend of yours might need your ideas sometime. Here is a good exercise to help. First, find some quiet time. It may help to use a journal or pad of paper to jot down your ideas. Think of an adult that you feel comfortable and safe with. Usually this is someone who is non-judgmental and trustworthy. It could be a parent, neighbor, teacher, librarian, someone at church, or a relative. Begin your list, and add to it as days go by. It always helps to have a growing list...

What's the best way to approach an adult with a problem?
When you approach the adult, remember that you can approach them step by step. If at any point it does not feel right, you can slow down or even change your mind to go further. The important point is to remind yourself that there are adults you can talk to, and feel comfortable with. Always continue to try another adult until you find one who listens and helps you in a respectful and sensitive way.

Remember: If you need immediate help, you can: Call 911, or the operator, go to the Emergency Room. For less urgent help, you can notify your doctor or health care provider.

Keeping connected in order to grow

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