Relationships: Friends and Family
As you grow into the teenage years, your feelings and thoughts about relationships may
shift and change too. Relationships take on a special importance . Firstly, it becomes
important to have friends at school and at your activities, and secondly, you want a
comfortable relationship with your family.
For young woman, relationships are very important and developing healthy relationships is
part of growing. Friends can be a lot of fun, and sometimes disappointing too. Relationships
with family members are changing as you grow. It's important to remember that changes in
caring relationships often create stronger and better relationships, although the road there
is sometimes rocky. A girl may think at times, "I feel alone."
The important point to remember is that girls need healthy relationships to grow.
What is a healthy relationship? This is a good question to sort through during the teenage
years. Generally, a healthy relationship is one that is respectful and caring.
Jean Miller Baker, author of "A New Women's Psychology" defines "Five Good Things" to a
identify a healthy relationship. Simply put, they are:
- A sense of zest or well-being that comes from connecting with another person. For instance, you may leave time spent with this person feeling energized at times, and quietly content at other times.
- The desire and energy to take action within the relationship. For example you may want to clear up a problem that you sense between you. When involved in healthy relationships you also enjoy being involved and active in your life.
- An increased sense of knowing yourself and the other. In a healthy relationship you will, with time, find yourself more confident of who you are, and also know the other person better too.
- An increased sense of worth or feeling good about who you are. Again, as you are around people who are caring and respectful, you develop a gentleness about yourself and know that you are valuable and good. This is difficult for girls to feel at times, yet the more that you around healthy relationships, the more this feeling will grow.
- Happiness for more relationships beyond the present ones.
Healthy relationships empower all people involved in them.
Relationships are not always smooth. There always comes a time in a relationship when
you need to express yourself or stand up for yourself. Maybe you felt hurt at what the
other person said or did, or maybe you need to say "no" to joining an activity that doesn't
fit your mood. Eventually, no matter how great a relationship is, you will need to speak up.
How that person reacts will tell you a lot about the other person in a relationship.
Hopefully, you will be pleasantly surprisedů